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Attachment-Focused Therapy

The ways we connect with other people are shaped by a lifetime of experiences.
We learn, often very early, what to expect from closeness, conflict, vulnerability, and care. Those lessons can become patterns that follow us into friendships, family relationships, romantic partnerships, and our relationship with ourselves.
Sometimes those patterns continue long after their usefulness.
Attachment-focused therapy offers a perspective to understand the ways you learned to connect, protect yourself, and navigate relationships. We’ll also work together to develop new possibilities for connection that feel safer and more authentic.

How attachment patterns can show up

You may notice:
  • Difficulty trusting people, even when you’re trying
  • Fear of abandonment or rejection
  • Pulling away when relationships become emotionally intense
  • Becoming anxious or preoccupied when someone feels distant
  • Difficulty asking for what you need
  • Feeling responsible for other people’s emotions
  • Struggling with boundaries or saying no
  • Repeating relationship patterns you understand intellectually but can’t seem to change
  • Feeling disconnected from your emotions or unsure what you need
  • Difficulty tolerating conflict, uncertainty, or vulnerability
  • Wanting closeness while also feeling the urge to protect your independence

Attachment patterns are not character flaws. (Read that again.) We adapt and develop in response to the relationships and environments we experienced early in our lives—and they’re malleable so as we learn about our patterns, we can build healthier ways of relating.

Our approach to attachment therapy

Attachment work has been getting a lot of press recently, which is great. But we don’t stop at a label or an internet quiz. We’ll work together to understand your style of relating, the strengths, and some of the coping mechanisms you developed out of fear that may no longer serve your adult self. It’s natural to need reassurance or want space in a relationship. By understanding your attachment wounds and history, you will have more choice in what you do with those feelings.
Together, we’ll get curious about what happens inside you when connection feels uncertain. What does your nervous system do? What story does your mind tell you? What do you reach for when you need comfort? What do you avoid?

Together, we may:

  • Identify patterns that emerge in relationships
  • Explore the experiences that shaped your expectations of connection
  • Notice how attachment patterns show up in the therapeutic relationship
  • Develop greater awareness of emotional and relational needs
  • Practice boundaries and communication
  • Build capacity for vulnerability without abandoning yourself
  • Explore the difference between healthy interdependence and over-functioning
  • Develop more compassionate ways of responding to protective parts of yourself
  • Strengthen your ability to choose relationships that align with your values
Our work may integrate attachment theory, relational therapy, narrative approaches, IFS-informed parts work, ACT, somatic awareness, and others.

Who this work is for

Attachment-focused therapy may be helpful if you:
  • Keep encountering the same relationship patterns
  • Want to understand why you respond so strongly to closeness or distance
  • Have difficulty trusting or depending on others
  • Struggle with boundaries
  • Are navigating intimacy, partnership, dating, or friendship
  • Want to develop a more secure relationship with yourself
  • Are healing from relational trauma or difficult early relationships

You can learn to stay connected to yourself while also letting other people in.

Hunter Sunrise

I work with individuals, couples and adolescents navigating life transitions and evolutions—chapters of change that ask us to reimagine who we are. My work often centers on experiences of grief and identity—how we hold what’s been lost, and how we rediscover ourselves in what comes next.

Learn More

Hunter Sunrise

I work with individuals, couples and adolescents navigating life transitions and evolutions—chapters of change that ask us to reimagine who we are. My work often centers on experiences of grief and identity—how we hold what’s been lost, and how we rediscover ourselves in what comes next.

Learn More

Hunter Sunrise

I work with individuals, couples and adolescents navigating life transitions and evolutions—chapters of change that ask us to reimagine who we are. My work often centers on experiences of grief and identity—how we hold what’s been lost, and how we rediscover ourselves in what comes next.

Learn More

Book a consultation

Book a consultation to explore whether attachment-focused therapy may be a good fit.

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